Wednesday, December 31, 2008

The Voodoo Doll.

The Voodoo Doll looks super cute! Especially with the pins stuck in its groin. Hahaha the facial expression totally suits it. So glad I bought it, every time I look at it feel like laughing. Hahahaha


D-Day Success!

The Mushrooms have landed on Normandy!  

Mushrooms have crawled all over and infested little Jasmin's heart. hahaha

She never looked more happy than tonight. =D 


Sunday, December 28, 2008

Far Horizons.



Dreaming is not what people do when they sleep.

Dreaming is what keeps people from sleeping.

My dreams, ambitions and goals are near impossible. But looking back, to be where I am now, was a dream itself. I shall keep dreaming. I want to keep dreaming.

My mummy said to me:" Always reach for the stars. Even if you fall, you fall on the moon."

The Gathering.

Harvest time. The day I collated all my photos from the other old computers. Have to wipe the computers clean before we sell them off. I think I only have photos dating back to 2006. Man. What happened to the rest of my life. Lol. 

Went back into the future today, just by looking at some photos. So many memories, bitter-sweet, hidden away in my brain. A treasure trove, storage of precious memories, waiting to be replayed over and over again. Saving them for old age, hope they last. 

The test of time. 

Saturday, December 27, 2008

Success!

Yay! Guess what? My mum went to download the images on the video camera. She was shocked. "How come only 15 pictures in here?!?" she exclaimed. I put on my best "I tried to tell you this many times before but you never listened" face and told her, "Cos inside only got space for 15 photos what." Ownage.

Following which, I related a sob story. During my Hainan trip, I had to ration the number of photos I took in a day. I counted only 5 photos maximum a day. Anything after that, I had to scroll through the 5 pictures, choose the ugliest one, and delete it to make space for a new photo. Damn sad la, unheard of, camera not enough memory for more than 5 photos a day. I have no pictures of Macau to bring back precisely because of that. Tell me how stupid that is. Fly all the way there cannot take pictures. O.o

Anyways, like all my long overdue upgrades, sigh, she agreed to get me a new camera. Which obviously need my guidance in choosing the right one (She somehow has an inbuilt internal money counter). Warning Warning! Too expensive! System Overload! Choose cheaper and least functional brand to temporarily satisfy need! Save money money money! Later when he complains again then buy another cheap camera! 

My Aunt the Missionary.

Aunty Alice. Sister, Aunty, Missionary. 

We gathered for dinner today, my dad's side. The BeeHoon, pork knuckle, honey roast chicken and the ham were the highlights of the dinner. I liked the pork knuckle. Later, we gathered in the living room to chit-chat. The topic soon turned to religion. An interesting discussion ensured; what was the difference between the different Christian churches and denominations? Aunty Alice was good at explaining this. Apparently the was the universal Church 2000 years ago. It split into the Greek Orthodox and Roman Catholic bodies. The Roman Catholic church begun to lose its affinity with the bible, and thus the other denominations began to splinter from it. Today, Roman Catholics still exist, but so do the other denominations which stemmed from it. What sets them apart, from what I gathered, were the styles of worship and different religious practices. However, what bound them together under the banner of Christianity was that they based their churches on the bible. Individual denominations were but movements by church members who felt that their churches were going off track, veering away from the teachings of the bible. These zealous Christians then begun their movements to revive their churches and to follow the bible more closely. Hence Methodists were founded by a guy who was know to be very methodical in his approaches to things. He was influenced by the holy spirit, and thereby started teaching people about the gospel in a methodical way. In other words, he found a methodical way to teach whatever was in the bible to fellow Christians. Hence the term Methodist! People who study the bible methodically. So what is the difference between Methodists and Anglicans and Presbyterians and Charismatic Christians etc? They were simply different revival movements founded by different people. Now the crucial questions is, regardless of what denomination your church is, how closely does it follow the Bible? That is the difference! 

I can attend a Presbyterian church one day and a Methodist church another, simply because they are just places of worship! What matters most is your personal relationship with Christ! The 2nd most important thing would probably be how much your church keeps to the teachings of the Bible. 

As Joel Ee once said: "I'm willing to travel far for good scripture." Somehow I always remember him saying that to me.

Thursday, December 25, 2008

The friend who peels prawns at 2 am.

I have a friend. He de-shells prawns at 2 am when he can't sleep. Then, he licks the knife clean and puts it back into his tub of cooking equipment. The very same knife he periodically threatens me with, behind closed doors.

He has violent tendencies. My cries for mercy and forgiveness are often met with hysterical laughter and glee. He loves to feel powerful, to feel in control. The bed and pillow and especially his blanket, all bear evidence of his capacity for violence. Slash marks, torn fibres, serrated edges bear silent witness to the events that previously unfolded in the room. He is careful. Always sure to draw the curtains or close the door to deflect wary eyes. His room is deceivingly simple and welcoming. Many a weary traveller often find themselves seeking rest on his bed. Taking comfort in his calming words. Then, quickly, he shuts the door.

I hear endless screams echo across the hallways.

His face... reminds me of the villain of the Texas Chain-saw Massacre. Big fat peeling lips, large yellow square teeth, and a slimy tongue. His face is crude, like the northern barbarians of old. His small squinty eyes stare out at u from behind a pair of meticulously cleaned spectacles. His hair is always messy, and the stench of the previous night's prawn shells hangs in the air around him. His body, big and flabby, scabby dry skin and pus from old scratch wounds, causes girls' ovaries to quiver in fear. His favourite tools of torture are the penknife, the red pen, and the infamous multipurpose kitchen knife. He swings them around with a vengeance, with a crazed fury in his eyes, determined to fill all that oppose his selfish rule with terror. 

His thoughts are twisted, hell-bent on destruction and chaos. He often forces himself into my room, and takes off his filthy slippers. He sniffs them. He dangles them precariously over my clean bed, bits of prawn shells still clinging to the underside. "Give me milk!" he demands. He needs a lot of it. Drinks like a pussy cat. Needs it in his food, his drink. I always give it to him. 

He knows how to fight dirty. He knows my weaknesses. He is smart. "I don't share notes with u ah!" is one of his favourite threats. Jealous of my huge room, he constantly seeks opportunities to rub himself all over my pristine bed. Like defiling something so innocent, so pure. He says he loves it, and has to be forced to leave. 

Sometimes, in order to get his way, he squirts water under my door. Threatens to flood my room. Many people have asked me about the little puddle of water around my door. He never gets it. The water never reaches anything important. More like a little patch of wetness after moping the floor. Such childishness I've to tolerate. But I am kind.

The monster. He obviously needs a girlfriend. I see the way he ogles lecherously at girls. Young girls, old women, fair men, little boys, MPVD, Elaine ******, he wants them all. The poor bugger. Its so hard to keep him away from the female cadavers during dissection. 

But he is my friend. =D

The Same Christmas.

Christmas never changes. Well, the true meaning of Christmas cannot be changed. But, superficially, all my Christmas days are identical.

A Christmas party, lots of relatives, eating, hardly interacting with any of them, end up watching television with my dad, then they leave. Now I'm alone in my room wondering what to do on Christmas day. My dad is sleeping, my mum is cleaning, and my sister is using the com. Wow right. Yet another boring Christmas day. 

I've really no clue what to do. My mum's plan for tonight: Eat the leftovers, go for a long walk to burn off the fat. Z man, that's what we do every other night right?

My father gave me a shirt for Christmas. He gave it to me yesterday, unwrapped, and only because my mum sort of mentioned it. Looks like we don't bother with presents and the anticipation now. 

I'm not complaining... I've got a present! Its just... everything is for the sake of doing it. What happened to the spirit of Christmas? Apart from the tree, we hardly bother to decorate the house anymore. No, we don't bother to put anything up anymore. No more opening presents together, no more sitting around the television as a family and watching Christmas shows. Have we grown up that much? Every visage of a white Christmas is gone, save for the Christmas tree which we have reused for the past 20 years.  There's nothing left. There hasn't been any for years. Unlike other kids, I never believed in Santa Claus. None of that rain-deer bullshit, none of that stocking crap. Why? Because my parents never did.

The good news: We'll be getting a new tree next year. 

Love Life

Eeshin, Geraldine, Jasmin.

Girls ah, can bring so much happiness, and so much pain. Watched this Chinese drama serial in ZhuHai, near the border with Macau. The guy said, when a girl wants you to be happy, you'll be happy, and when she wants you to be sad, you'll feel endless sorrow. 

Eeshin was my first. Young, foolish and innocent, everything felt magical. Her sweet voice, adorable face and heart-shaped smile, together with her feminine, girlish personality was simply irresistible. Little pecks on her cheeks brought so much joy into my day. Subtly, she controlled how far we went. Always careful to turn her face away when I kissed too near her lips. My first french kiss was on her balcony. The night was young, and we just finished the dinner she cooked for me. Spaghetti, one of the best I remember tasting. She had just bathed, smelt wonderful. Little bit of cuddling at the balcony, so much happiness between the both of us. Crazily in love would be the perfect phrase to sum things up. We kissed and she slipped me some tongue. The night seemed to stretch on forever.

Geraldine was my second. I was bitter, vengeful, spiteful and selfish. So sorry she had to bear the brunt of my angst. I used her and played with her. Did to her exactly what Eeshin did to me. I felt I could play with girls as and when I wanted. Horrible can barely describe my thinking and reasoning then. We started off a torrid relationship. It didn't really end because it never really started. 

Jasmin, not yet. I respect this girl, yet something inside me keeps telling me to remain cautious. More mature, level-headed and less selfish, I try not to let my possessive and jealous personality mar things. This girl is everything I didn't expect, but somehow she's perfect. Her emotions come in strong waves. I can tell if she's upset or really happy just by looking and talking to her. This girl doesn't plan far ahead, she doesn't want to, doesn't need to. Happy go-lucky, I admire this aspect of her character. Complements my controlling, order seeking personality. Jasmin can be so sweet at times, and in need of constant assurance. Insecurity seems to be a major flaw in her character. But this shouldn't be a problem... that sorts of complements my possessive personality. There are 2 sides to the same coin. The loud, attention-seeking, funny and adorable girl I've come to love, and the wild and crazy girl I see in clubs. I have accepted and love both sides of her, but the question is, should I? Experience tells me otherwise. Only time can tell. Jasmin, this girl could be everything I'd ever want.

Last Christmas, I gave you my heart, and the very next day, you gave it away.

I love the song Last Christmas. Lol. Brings back painful memories. Eeshin. 

Spending this Christmas night alone again. Somehow, I've always spent Christmas alone. Sad case sia. Jasmin is still on holiday in China, and she hates me because she thinks I don't wanna call her or message her. Sigh. Mummy vs. Jasmin. In the end Marc dies. 

Try to balance both, in the end kena wack by both. Cry and then go to sleep. Haiz. This is my kind of Christmas. Emotional sia. 

Will try to call Jasmin using my mum's handphone. Sure kena kpkb by both again.

Darling Jasmin, if you ever read this, don't think I'm like your ex okay. I wanna call. 

Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Plastic Mushroom

Plastic Surgery. I'm beginning to like it. Assisted with 2 plastic surgeons during the Hainan medical mission. Man. Dr. Foo could do sutures so small and so quickly. The nicest and smallest sutures I've ever seen. Not that I've seen many, but he was amazing. 

The face is so damn vascular it bleeds like crazy. 

New interesting techniques I've never seen before, like how they cut pieces of your upper eyelids out and suture the 2 ends together to widen your eyes. And how making those jagged cuts, removing the flesh between the skin and sewing the jagged ends precisely together actually helps the 2 ends to heal better and tighter, reducing the scar size. Fascinating. The world of plastic surgery beckons. 

Under local anaesthetic, when you can't feel a thing, scalpels slice your flesh apart, hooks dig into your flesh and pulls the wound open, blood and tissue is constantly sucked out by a watchful nurse, some weird dissecting equipment sears your flesh to burn tissue off and to seal wounds, yet you sleep on. Your body is a surgeon's playground. =D

A scary thought. 

The Mushroom who Sutured.

The Hainan Medical Mission was simply amazing. Got to assist in surgery, and most importantly, live suturing! Insane! I was assisting Dr. Fong, and after he removed the cyst, he turned to me and said: "OK suture." I was like fuck fuck fuck I've only finished first year! And he didn't know I was only in first year!

So with trembling hands, I picked up the needle with the needle holder, and sutured. Wow. Luckily I practised a lot with my study buddy group. So I was able to suture fairly well, apart form the wide gaps between sutures, and the fact that I once poked in the needle, decided that it was in the incorrect position, removed the needle and drove it through the patient's skin again. Man, Desmond saw it, and he criticised me the entire trip for that. What the hell, hahaha I was damn scared ok! Be thankful I even remembered how to suture!

I admire Dr. Fong for letting medical students gain such valuable experiences on the field. I never knew live skin was so difficult to puncture, even with such a sharp needle. Man, the human body is really damn tough. 

Suturing was my most memorable experience at the WenChang hospital.

The Mushroom who jumped off Macau Tower

Insane I tell u. 233 meters above the ground. Every single thought was centred around shit shit shit I'm gonna die why did I say yes fuck fuck fuck die die die what if the rope breaks why is Christine falling so fast damn I'm freaking stupid for a medical student.

But I did it. Successfully did the world's tallest sky-jump. And I've a video to prove it! Hahaha the feeling's amazing. And the fear, the adrenaline, and the feeling of my balls quivering before stepping off the edge.... was worth it. The sudden plunge, hanging there while the photographer took shops of me... then the dreadful good-bye wave, hanging mid-air waiting to be dropped all the way down, those seconds seemed to stretch forever. Then the acceleration, the screaming. I saw the beautiful scenery on the way down, but nothing registered in my head. I hate the acceleration. Hahaha but I loved it when the speed became constant. 

Definitely one of the best things I've attempted in my life. I must say, thanks to Desmond who pressured me into jumping. I regretted it until I jumped off. Then I understood. The thrill. Man.

The most difficult parts are, 1.) Paying the money. After that, its the point of no return. ahaha Its quite expensive too. 2.) Stepping off the edge. Fuck. Definitely need balls for that. 

And this Christine ah. Hate her so much. The smartest and bravest girl I've met so far. A girl with such a strong character, and an adorable personality at times. hahaha Thanks for doing the jump with me. Or pressuring me into doing it. lol

Sunday, December 7, 2008

The Chinese Mushroom.

Off to China tomorrow morning! Insanely early flight... 6.00am. Going to Hainan Island for a medical mission trip.... basic medical stuff only. There after going backpacking around Guangdong region... Maoming, Zhaoqing, maybe Foshan, Guangzhou and finally Macau. 

Hope I brought enough cash... didn't want this to be an expensive trip. And my backpack... omg... its only 5kg! The best thing was that I paid for an extra 5kg baggage allowance to top up the 15kg allotted to each passenger. Hahaha on the flip side, I'll be travelling really light. lolol. Hope I brought enough underwear.... if not maybe I can borrow from Huilin or Christine. LOL.

Speaking of underwear.... some girls wear their underwear in the day and then to sleep and then to club and then never change. For days. I mean eeeewwweee. And I thought I was gross for flipping my underwear inside out to reuse for 2 days. Sick la. Fungus and all sorts of parasites living where the sun doesn't shine. Not as if not enough washing detergent. Ewwe. 

Kaez. I'm gonna wake up in like 3 hours. Hahaha man. Miss my Jasmin again la. The fatass looked so pretty today in that dress. And I love the way she smelt. The perfume masked the smell coming from her unchanged underwear. 

Jasmin says 20, 24, 26  
Marc says 20, 24, 30

Hahahahahahaha OK OK LA. Maybe 26.

Saturday, December 6, 2008

The Mushroom and a very naughty Jasmin.

Wow, the past few nights all felt like one very long day. Went clubbing on Wed Mambo night and Friday night at The Butter Factory.... tiring man..

Every day see hot girls until eyes dry nose bleed arms pain cos kena pinched by Jasmin.

On Wed night, went to Zouk with the Monash peeps and some other people. It was some of the Monash peeps first times clubbing. The night wasn't as fun as the last time I went with the Officer Cadets. Maybe guys just know how to have more fun hahahaha. But it looked like Huilin, Chunyi and Sarah enjoyed themselves, so i guess it was worth it. I've always liked mambo music, but after last Friday's R&B at Butter Factory, maybe I've taken on a liking to R&B too. Hmmm.

Saw my ex at Zouk. Hmmm. She was hotter than I expected her to be. Damn. Dances even better than before. haha But screw it, shes with some fugly ABC now and I've got Jasmin so I own her hahahahaha. Ooooh Jasmin was jealous that I kept looking at her the whole night. Zzzz possessive little thing. 1.) Haven't seen her for so many years already, just curious la. 2.) If Alex were to be there you'll be staring at him too! 3.) Why are you so jealous, you're the one I'm kissing now! 4.) You're fatter than her and I love fat fugly things.

hahahaha

Looking at my ex cannot, dance with some total stranger and going for a drink with him holding his hand can.   O.o   Something is not right here...

Old feelings of jealousy are flooding back into me. Usually after feeling this way, I would always bring up all sorts of childish and petty arguments to get my ex to make things up with me. But I was possessive and childish then, and she couldn't take it in the end. Being a little more mature now and less possessive, somethings I let pass, cos I'm not gonna go down in history books as a selfish person. Some hurtful and spiteful things I won't say, cos I know very well I can hurt deeply using words, and I treasure the patience and tolerance I've learnt to develop over the years.

But just cos I don't wanna argue with you, doesn't mean I can't, and it definitely doesn't mean that nothing is wrong. Its just that I never wanna say such hurtful things I can't take back. So I guess I'll use silence and time to reason with you, and perhaps when you understand how I think better I'll let you in a little more.

For now, know that I love you, and to toy with you is the furthest thing from my mind. Instead of seeing me as uncaring and mean, perhaps try to understand why I did those things, and things I could have done on impulse but didn't do. Then, maybe you can take comfort in how much I actually love you.

Wednesday, December 3, 2008

More little mushrooms!

Gathered at Matthew's place today for a meet-the-year-ones session. Was fun to meet up with new faces and recognise the old ones again! They look like a pretty smart bunch, and I'm sure they'll be much more successful in their studies than my batch. Considering the number of RJ people there. haha Insane la. The girls in their batch also damn cute. But I still love my Jasmin more. The fugly little thing. Just can't stand her.

Went out with Jasmin today. So good to see her back again! Her smile ah.... awesome. And I love, love hugging and kissing her. Mmmmmm. Like a personal teddy bear la. Squeeze, hug, kiss and love! Mmmmm missing her already. Could tell she missed me too! So nice to have her in my arms again and have her looking back at me. Sigh. I've become such a pussy again. lolz

Wow the show Quarantine was impressive. Thought it was a no brainer at first. Those kind of Jasmin shows. hahaha just kidding. But yea... it was so worth the money. Really, first time in a long while I actually felt scared watching a thriller. And its got that zombie element in it too, my favourite. And Jasmin screamed and screamed and screamed and screamed.....

Ohohoh nearly forgot! Jasmin grew slimmer by a bit! hahaha Now she also has a nice tight ass la! Looked fantastic in her white pants today, as compared to the flabby and saggy lumps in Melbourne that were painful to look at. Woo. Lucky me. hahahahahaha.

Been already a year since I first started Med school! How fast is that! Time flies, and it really really flew by this year! Cool la, 1 year in Melbourne an I'm still a virgin.

Help the juniors, study hard, play hard, and enjoy year 2! Gonna be a fun year, I can tell. Especially staying with the guys in South East Flats. hahahaha Wild gay sex anytime, anywhere I want! Just kidding hahahahaha man I'm so warped. 

Need to start talking more to the juniors, cannot be dao. Realised the seniors helped us out alot. Will probably take some of them for study buddy. ahahaha screw them over with wrong answers. hahahha 

Nights All!

Monday, December 1, 2008

Male Chauvinistic Mushroom

I think I'm a MCP, and I'm proud of it.

Think about it, all the traits of a girl's ideal gentleman, all revolve around the guy being essentially a MCP. Opening the door for the girl: cos the door is too heavy and she's too weak to open it for herself. Over time it stuck and applied to all doors. Paying for dinner: The girl is usually not depended on in the family, hence the heads of all families are males. It is tradition, and it is practical. Thus the girl would have less in the pocket than the guy, and hence its ok for the guy to pick up the tab. Sending a girl all the way home. Sure, cos she IS a girl and thus more susceptible to attacks and stuff.

So yes, being a guy means being a MCP. For both traditional, practical, courtesy and courtship reasons.

But why, in this modern times, where none of the above situations can apply, is a male still required to conform to the traditional ideas of being a gentleman? Automated doors, decreasing gender inequalities, increase (shocking) in female spending power, and taxis that send the girl all the way to her doorstep. Cos of tradition? Cos it appeals to the females? Courtesy perhaps?

For some relationships... I would suggest that the girl is abusing the idea of being a gentleman.

Say its 11pm. Jack and Jill are in Orchard Road making out. They decide that they shouldn't have sex in the open, and go home. Jack stays in the west and Jill in the east. Jill wants Jack to send her all the way home, knowing that if Jack does so, he won't have transport home and would probably have to either call a cab or his parents to pick him up. Jill doesn't care and insists on Jack sending her home, claiming that he wouldn't be a gentleman if he doesn't. How?

Is the idea of being a gentleman being thrown about so carelessly, and abused so freely?

Paying for dinner is another touchy issue. Nowadays, there is no such thing as a clear cut situation where the boy gets way more money than the girl. In fact, I think it is probably likely that the girl you're dating has way more pocket money than you do. And guess what, the guy, in order to have the distinct honour of being called a gentleman by the girl, has to pay for all the taxi fare, the dinner, the movie tickets, the shopping espenditure etc etc etc. And the girl gets to spend all her money on stuff she wants! Woohoo! Depleted my boyfriend's measely allowance, so I can spend all of mine on expensive Gucci and Prada stuff, which the boyfriend will probably never see her carry! How bloody twisted is that.

When you find a girl that offers to pay for dinner, saying that its her treat, omg... stick to her. Not for her money of course, but cos this girl is different from all the trash you find outside. Shes got some basic rules right.

Its surprising, that most parents agree that during dates, both the guy and the girl should be treated as equals, and the time and cost blah blah blah of the date be shared equally between the 2 of them. However their daughters do not seem to share such beliefs... hmmmm why huh...

Spending a guys money and wasting his time can be addictive I think. I imagine free taxi rides alll round the island, free dinners and movies, free this and that... and tada! an entire pocket full of YOUR own money UNTOUCHED, to spend on whatever you want! All for the price of a few "i love you"s. =D

Man, if I was a girl... I'll be a serial dater. hahaha nonono I wanna be a pornstar first.

So, little mushrooms, to conclude, guys, be gentlemen, do the right thing, but choose your girls carefully. Girls, screw the gentleman shit, be suprised when your date turns out to be one. I think the best way to turn a guy into a gentleman, is for the girls to start being one herself. hahaha That'll make the guy feel bad really fast.

And if you're a total money-sucking slut, and find a MCP willing to dote on you, damn you're lucky.

Mushroom thinking cap.

My mum arh... just needs to relax. So anal bout everything... not that she just scolded me or anything, but thats how I feel in general. Stop complaining about the economy and money and taxes and work and just freaking enjoy the holiday! Whats left of it anyways, after she decided to bring her laptop, handphone and whats that thing called... PDA or something... sick la. She even went to her company's Hokaido branch. O.o

Ah yes... need to bitch about this thing. Been keeping it in me for days. Figured that if I blurted it out it wouldn't be so nice. My sis just got her results back, credits in 3 subjects and a near pass in the 4th. That means a FAIL. Wow you're not gonna believe my mum. Woah, thats a miracle already la! After all, finance was such a difficult subject for you! It very very good already! Very proud of you. Ah lets buy a packet of Japanese potato chips to celebrate!

WTF.

Even though my results have yet to be released... I already told my mum how I expected I would do... And she was like... Uh ok, make sure you keep studying hard cos its very competitive ah. The she continued reading the papers.

WTF.

Near pass for a subject = Miracle! Straight HD for the entire year = Please continue to work hard.

And I didn't even talk about my grades even once, save for the time when I first told my mum how I think I did after the exam review. Some one please tell me there is at least a little bit of favouritism going on here. Bullshit... just cos I don't snuggle up to you on the bed like a pet or act cute doesn't mean I don't need attention and affection.

Its been going on for several years now. I'm always the RELIABLE one, the one whom you can spend less time on, give less attention to, worry less about, and always DEPEND on to perform.

Thats partly why I'm so stressed at school during exam times ok, cos I'm the one both parents are relying on to support them in old age. Didn't take much for me to figure this out. For my sis's next semester subjects, my parents advised her to take French.... tell me... for what fucking use? Can't even do chinese or english properly like me. Obviously the aim is to get her to do whatever she likes doing, and will most probably suceed in. In other words, get a degree and get out of uni.

What if I fuck up for once? How? Are my parents gonna rely on her for retirement? On what, a degree based on barely there passes and a variety of useless skills?

The best part is, at the age of 19, all she has to do is cry and say that she didn't think she'll do well. Then, its... aiyo, don't cry la, mummy buy some of your favourite chips for you. The important thing is for you to work hard... blah blah blah study useless languages, play around in school, buy useless girlie things, waste money on expensive bags, spend time with your fellow ah lians and ah bengs blah blah blah and do better for the next exam ok? Mummy loves you always.

I suspect that... the nature of how my family relates to each other is one of the main reasons why... for the lack of a better term... I tend to be a MCP. Despite all this crap, I will still strive on to be the best. I'll always recount the days when I forced my mum to eat her words and rendered her speechless. How come Ivan beat you by so much in PSLE? 4 years later Ivan got owned in O levels. How come Xi Yang beat you by so much in O levels? 2 years later Xi Yang got owned in A levels. Howcome WenJun beat you by so much in A levels? Months later I'm doing med and I won't bitch about him cos hes a very very good childhood friend and still is.

Well, thats probably why she isin't so concerned about my studies anymore... cos I keep beating all her expectations. One can say I brought this all upon myself from the start...

A victim of my own success? To early to say. I won't give up... I'll be the best. And I'll do it despite all this bullshit. And I'll know, that I relied on only myself and God to get there.

And from there, anywhere is possible.

Snowy Prelude.

Brrrr.... Experienced snow for the first time today. Little soft white specks floating down from the sky. So very pretty, and so very cold. It was -2 degrees... and the snow didn't melt... it carpeted the ground. Cool Stuff.

Tomorrow will be a long day... will begin my jouney back to Singapore... starting first with a 7am flight back to Tokyo. Man... I hate those small cramped airplanes... makes me clostophobic.

Hmmm.. haven't been checking my emails lately... and when I finally opened it today... Mr. Popular has 39 unread emails in just 5 days! None of them junk of course. =D hahaha man I missed so many group gatherings... hmmmm until now I wasn't sure this Japan holiday had been such a great idea. Z. Anyways... looking forward to the one on 2nd Dec. Didn't realise how much I actually missed the Monash peeps until I read all the emails.

Ooooh hey... I've read that like almost 50% of the time... a guy's thoughts are on sex! How cool is that... I'm not sure of the accuracy of the information... but I think the actual percentage is alot lower than that... hahaha I estimate I think about sex about..... hmmmm 20% of the time? That like... out of ever 5 secs.... like... hmmmm what should I do today? Play ball? Watch TV? Get some work done? Go out with friends? Sex sex sex sex sex sex Hmmm.... maybe I should visit my mum... or read a book.... or go swimming.... or blog about yesterday.... Sex sex sex sex sex sex. hahaha

Haha and no, thats not how I usually think. Mine is something like this...

Hi sexsexsex darling, sexsexsex wanna sexsexsex go sexsexsex out sexsexsex with sexsexsex me sexsexsex today?

lololol. Poor Jasmin... she'll be really traumatised when she reads this. haha
Sorry darling girl... low sex-drive people having relationships with high sex-drive people is like that one. ;D

Hahaha love you pui pui, can't wait to see you again!

Nights All!